TONY
“Sometimes, you’ve got to judge a book by its cover — especially when you do what I do.”
Archive for the 'homelessness' Category
What I do
May 27, 2010Tony’s body of knowledge
May 26, 2010
TONY
“This heat is just killing me. I was down in the hospital for three hours yesterday. I was really lucky, my bus driver friend saw me and got me on his bus because I’ll tell you, I was really getting dizzy in the heat.”
PHILIP
“So what happens now?”
TONY
“Well now at least I know I can cool down in their emergency waiting room.”
Begging the question
May 25, 2010
PHILIP
“Tony, is there anything good about being homeless?”
TONY
“That’s like asking if there’s anything good about having cancer.”
PHILIP
“Sorry.”
TONY
“Don’t worry; it was a good question, if you know what I mean.”
He’ll stand on guard for free
May 22, 2010
TONY
“I got myself a job for Sunday.”
PHILIP
“Great! What is it?”
TONY
“Well, it’s two hours looking after the corner store. The owner can’t be there and folks keep swiping her flowers plants. I told her it was no problem since I was going to be there anyway. She didn’t even have to pay me since it’s the neighbourhood, if you know what I mean. But I know she’ll give me something anyway.”
How long has this been going on?
May 21, 2010
PHILIP
“How many days have you been wearing that McDonalds t-shirt?”
TONY
“Yeah, I’ve been wearing it a few days but I wash it when it’s dirty so it’s no problem most times.”
Some people just don’t get it
May 20, 2010
TONY
“You what someone left in my hat when I was away from my post? Someone left me a cheap watch in my hat with a broke wrist band. I mean, what am I gonna do with that? Some people, they just don’t get it, if you know what I mean.”
Death and texting
May 18, 2010
PHILIP
“What’s new?”
TONY
“You hear about the cyclist who was killed up there on Dundas at Sterling Road, you know on the overpass there? The guy driving his car, he was sending messages with his cell phone, it’s what they call ‘texting’.”
PHILIP
“Oh my god! When was this?”
TONY
“Just the other day. That driver is in for a ton of trouble. Manslaughter for sure, if you ask me.”
Falling like flies
May 17, 2010
TONY
“You know that guy Stan, he sometimes hung around that new place you sometimes go. You know, ‘Lit‘, down the street there, you know that one, the one called ‘Lit’. Anyway they found him lying dead there where he got that room, down on King there. That’s another one down. We’re falling like flies, if you know what I mean.”
Just serving him right
May 15, 2010
TONY
“You know, last month or something, I was asking people for money so I could buy myself a sausage for lunch. Well, I ended up with nine sausages and one hell of of stomach ache. Just serves me right, if you know what I mean. And I didn’t even eat all nine.”
Feet in the clouds
May 14, 2010
TONY
“Check out my new shoes. You know, they go for more than $100 a pair. The guy up at the shoe store gave ’em to me.”
PHILIP
“How did that happen?”
TONY
“Well, he walks down the street, he looks at my shoes and he tells me I should have better shoes. Next thing you know, he brings me into the store, he goes in the back and comes ou with these and he just gives me them. And, let me tell you, are they comfortable, you know. It’s like walking on a cloud in these.”
Or else
May 11, 2010
PHILIP
“You want to hear my favourite quote? I just put it up on the chalkboard in Alternative Grounds. It’s from Lincoln. So the quote is: “Have I not destroyed my enemies if I have made friends of them?’ Deep, eh?”
TONY
“You’re not kidding! That’s what you gotta do if you’re where I am — or else.”
Service with a smile
May 6, 2010
PHILIP
“How come you’ve never made me a coffee?” I figure I’ve made you a hundreds cups over the last 10 years.”
TONY
“I don’t know but I’ll make you one if you say how’d you like it.”
PHILIP
“OK, medium-dark,lots of cream and go medium on the sugar … “Hey, look at that. It’s service with a smile!”
TONY
“You betcha.”
Like a flash
April 28, 2010
TONY
“I gotta tell you this. So here I was and this lady walks up to me and she says she doesn’t have money but she could do a trade if I wanted.”
PHILIP
“What was on offer?”
TONY
“So she just pulls up her sweater all the way, knockers and everything, then she smiles right at me and off she goes up the street. Just like that. Now that’s a pretty nice thing to give a guy, if you know what I mean. I’m not kidding you either, Phil.”
Breakfast with the best – Part II
April 21, 2010
Here’s the real photo.
Breakfast with the best
April 20, 2010
TONY
“Check out my breakfast here. They say these things aren’t so good for you but I ain’t saying no to this.”
Sick
April 19, 2010
PHILIP
“You know that homeless guy who got killed last. I don’t remember a thing you told me about him.”
TONY
“That was George, you know, the guy who was missing a leg so he got around with his wheelchair. He hung around down there, a few blocks down the street. I wonder who could kill a guy who was a cripple. That’s sick, if you ask me.”
[Apologies for the sparse content over the last two months. Philip]
Tony impersonates The Flying Nun
April 16, 2010
Tony and Phil
April 4, 2010
TONY
“You know, Phil, our blog readers should see this great picture of you and me that Lina took the other day. Besides, it’s about time if you ask me: I don’t think you’ve ever been in a photo on the blog. Well, let me put it this way, like they always say, it’s never too late to change.”
More on Tony’s cancer
April 1, 2010PHILIP
“I forgot to ask you about what kind of cancer you have.”
TONY
“Lung, lung cancer. My left one. The doc told me I’ve got a year to a year -and-a-half. I don’t think I’m going to go in for surgery. It’s just different risks when you think about it. And they think it’s already spreading. At least it’s spreading slowly from what they can tell me.”
Tony has cancer
March 26, 2010Hi All,
Tony has been coughing up blood for more than a month, though we haven’t spoken of it here. After coughing incessantly for several hours yesterday, he went to Toronto Western Hospital and they confirmed it. He was told that he had 18 months to live without surgery, which is somewhat iffy at this stage of the cancer. So he hasn’t made a decision.
After telling me the news, he lit up a cigarette and said: “Let me put it this way — a cigarette can’t hurt me now.”
More when I know more.
Philip
Homeless Man Speaks 