Archive for the 'bum' Category

Joke of the butt

December 26, 2007

Sancho Panza

You got any stories that might bring a smile to your readers during Christmas time?

“It’s funny that you asked that question since I was just thinking about a funny thing that happened to me a few years ago – it wasn’t funny at the time though. This is when I learned that wooden toilet seats are better than the other plastic ones, even those thick plastic ones.

“So I was sitting on this toilet made of that thick plastic I was talking about — not one of those flimsy ones — and it just cracked under my bum. Somehow one of my cheeks got caught in the crack, and boy did that hurt. I just screamed bloody murder. Turns out it was bleeding pretty bad but I didn’t know. So I started bleeding through my pants, ’til they were totally bloody all down the back of my legs. I couldn’t sit on that cheek for almost 2 months, if you know what I mean. The wood seats just wouldn’t do that to you.”

Going soft on bums

August 22, 2007

Bum pad

“I see you’ve got yourself a luxury pad for your bum, Mr. Clemens.”

“And, let me tell you, when I’m done the day, it folds up nice too.”

“How about we do a photo shoot?”

“Where do I stand?”
PS: Question – What would make this blog better?  Thanks for your comments.   –  Philip

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